The politics of listening: gaining influence by giving attention
Listening as a superpower
When we think of political savvy, we often picture someone speaking: delivering persuasive arguments, sharing compelling narratives, or making bold presentations. But in reality, one of the most powerful political tools you can learn isn’t speaking at all. It’s listening
Listening is more than just about hearing the words that someone says. It’s about noticing what’s being said, what’s being unsaid, and what’s being implied. It’s about giving people the experience of being understood. In organisational politics, listening is influencing because people trust those who make them feel heard
The product and transformation leaders who master listening don’t just gather information. They build credibility, defuse resistance, and create alignment withut saying very much at all
Why listening matters
Listening isn’t passive. Quite the opposite. When done well, it takes a lot of energy and is an active political strategy. It:
builds trust. People are more likely to support leaders who listen to them
reveals hidden agendas. Careful listening surfaces what’s really driving behaviour
strengthens relationships. Listening signals respect and empathy
improves timing. By listening, you sense when to push and when to pause
shapes influence. People are more open to your ideas when they feel you’ve understood theirs
The levels of listening
There are many frameworks out there that help you decipher how well you are listening. This is one of them:
level 1 - surface listening. You are hearing the words but not the meaning behind them
level 2 - strategic listening. You are listening for facts, data, and explicit content
level 3 - political listening. You are listening for subtext, emotion, and hidden agendas
level 4 - transformational listening. You are listening in a way that makes the other person feel valued and changed by the interaction
The higher the level you hit, the greater the influence you have
Example 1: The meeting that shifted
A General Manager in Product noticed a peer repeatedly objected to her proposal in meetings. Instead of pushing harder, she invited him to coffee and simply listened. He revealed his real concern: he believed the proposal threatened his team’s long term viability as it would take away some of their current responsibilities and automate them. By acknowledging this and adjusting the framing, she turned an opponent into an ally
Lesson: listening uncovers the real issue behind the resistance
Example 2: The silent win
A General Manager in Transformation sat quietly and listened carefully during a heated debate. When he finally spoke, he summarised everyone’s concerns more clearly than they had done so themselves. The room shifted and suddenly he was seen as the voice of reason
Lesson: listening can position you to be the most credible person in the room
Example 3: The missed opportunity
A Head of Strategy and Transformation was so focused on pitching his idea that he ignored subtle cues of discomfort from his stakeholders. Later, he learnt that they had concerns he could have addressed in the room but by not listening he lost their trust
Lesson: failing to listen erodes influence, no matter how strong your argument
Practicing political listening
There are a few simple steps you can take that will make a great impact:
be fully present. Put away all distractions (yes that includes your mobile phone) and signal your attention with body language and tone
listen for layers. What’s being said? What’s not being said? What emotions are underneath?
reflect back. Paraphrase to show your understanding and validate feelings, not just facts
ask curious questions. “What’s most important to you about this?” or “What would success look like for you?” are often a good place to start
hold the silence. Don’t rush to fill the gaps as silence often invites the deeper truth to come out
Once you feel like you’ve mastered the simple steps, you can try:
listening across groups. Notice how different stakeholders talk about the same issue with different audiences
listening for language patterns. Words reveal priorities (e.g. “efficiency”, “risk”, “recognition”)
listening for political clues. Pay attention to who interrupts whom, who defers, and who stay silent
listening to yourself. Notice when your own agenda is drowning others out
Common mistakes leaders make
Product and transformation leaders are passionate people but this passion can often lead to some common mistakes during conversations such as:
listening to reply. Planning your response in your head whilst others are talking rather than absorbing what they are saying
listening selectively. Only hearing what confirms your views and discarding the rest
performative listening. Nodding without giving genuine attention
over listening. Endlessly gathering input without moving to action
Listening and leading
Listening doesn’t mean agreeing with everything that you hear. It means understanding before acting. The balance is to listen deeply, then lead decisively. The best product and transformation leaders:
listen first, speak second
use listening to build trust
translate what they hear into action
signal that voices matter, even when decisions differ
Example 4: The listening leader
A Chief Operating Officer was known for starting every meeting by asking others to share first. She rarely spoke until the end, when she synthesised the discussion and set the direction. Her reputation as a listener made people more willing to follow her lead because they felt ownership in the outcome
Lesson: listening strengthens authority, it doesn’t weaken it
Your homework for this week
In your next meeting, how can you listen in a way that makes someone feel more understood than they expected?
Things you could do to help you with this:
choose one upcoming converstion
commit to listening more than speaking
ask one curious, open ended question
reflect back what you heard
notice how the relationship shifts
Why this matters
Listening is influence. It builds trust, reveals hidden dynamics, and positions you as credible and fair
Product and transformation leaders who master the politics of listening don’t just gather information. They shape the political climate by making others feel heard. In organisations, people don’t always remember what you said, but they will certainly always remember how you listened to them
Want to gain greater influence by strengthening your listening skills?
Let’s work on this together. Here are three ways:
Influencing for Impact: This practical 2-day workshop is for you if you want to influence a decision maker, influence a change in customer or colleague behaviour, or influence someone to buy something from you
Executive and Leadership Team Coaching: Work directly with Lai-Ling to problem solve for your specific situation in a confidential setting. This is for you if you want to develop and execute on a game plan that is 100% tailored to you
Leadership Development: Invest in the product and transformation leaders in your company with leadership development that is customised for their role. This is for you if you want your people to learn about people and politics